A Christmas Quiz

Well, fellow sippers, swillers, imbibers and imbeciles – the end of the year is nigh.
And before you all reel off to the coast for a well-earned break, it’s time to test your knowledge on wine, events, 2012 and various other non-categories of unimportance and see if you can tell your claret from your Beaujolais (first point goes to anyone who knows which song that is from). Put your tongue in your cheek, some wine in your glass and enjoy.

1.   If Delaire’s Coastal Cuvee Sauvignon Blanc comes from Stellenbosch and their normal Sauvignon comes from the coast, can you draw a map of Uruguay?

2.    Red Tape Wine, Orange River Cellars, Yellow Lorry Sauvignon – can you sing a rainbow, sing a rainbow, sing a rainbow too??

3.    Complete the declension:
Vinpro – Vinpras – Vinprat - Vinpramus - __________ - ____________

4.    Tricky one here (the answer is ‘c’) – can you tell me the correct spelling (it’s ‘c’ guys) for the word which describes either the sense of taste or the projecting part on the lower lip of a bilabiate corolla that closes the throat, as in a snapdragon? (just a hint – the answer is ‘c’)
a)    Pallet
b)    Palette
c)    PALATE (whoo-hoo! It’s this one - ok?)
d)    Armadillo
(Note to Ed. – is this a bit too difficult?)

5.    How does any ONE of the following differ from any one of the others?
a)    WOSA
b)    WIETA
c)    Wonga
d)    WhatsApp

6.    Explain the correlation between midnight skinny-dipping in a hotel pool and favourable UK wine reviews for the next ten years? (we’ve got the pictures boet!)

7.    If a barrel weighs 150kg and half a barrel, how much does a tray of waterblommetjies cost at Klaapmuts?

8.    “The exact equation between the quantity of facial hair on the winemaker and the quality of the wines produced is in the ratio (a-b +37) to (a2 + b2 - 14) where ‘a’ = hair and ‘b’= Platter stars.” Discuss with reference to Adi Badenhorst, David Sadie and Callie Louw.

9.    Do NOT draw a sketch map of the layout of Cape Wine 2012, but write no more than three sentences on the early metefaction of acidilic bacillosis in Pinotage.

10.   Fill in the names of some of the following:
a)    _________________________
b)    _________________________
c)    _________________________
d)    Vermaaklikheid
(this question should not be attempted by persons outside SA)

11.   If Adam Mason has moved to Mulderbosch and RJ Botha has gone to Kleine Zalze, can anyone guess where Karl Lambour will be making wine next week?

12.   Would you rather buy
a)    Sauvignon Blanc from Mark Boucher
b)    Chenin Blanc from Chad le Clos
c)    Blanc de Blanc from Oscar Pistorius
d)    Klippies and coke from Jack Parow?

Answers on a postcard addressed to PO Box 69, Stellenbosch, 5890 will not be answered, but the winners of the Christmas Quiz will be announced on Pinterest when we’ve worked out where to buy the pins.